Looney Labs Chrononauts Mailing list Archive

[Chrononauts] Good thing the timeline wasn't set to 1803'

  • FromBill Andel <bill_andel@xxxxxxxxx>
  • DateFri, 21 Aug 2009 06:42:36 -0700 (PDT)
A friend sent me this and it made me think of EAC, so I thought I'd pass it along for the rest of you to get a chuckle, too.

 A New Orleans lawyer sought an FHA loan for a client who lost his
 house in Hurricane Katrina and wanted to rebuild. He was told the
 loan would be granted if he could prove satisfactory title to the
 parcel of property being offered as collateral. The title to the property
 dated back to 1803, which took the Lawyer three months to track
 down. After sending the information to the FHA, he received the
 following reply: (Actual letter is below...)

 "Upon review of your letter adjoining your client's loan
 application, we note that the request is supported by an Abstract of
. While we compliment the able manner in which you have
 prepared and presented the application, we must point out that you
 have only cleared title to the proposed collateral property back to
 1803. Before final approval can be accorded,
it will be necessary to
 clear the title back to its origin."

 Annoyed, the lawyer responded as follows:
 (Actual Letter is below...)

 "Your letter regarding title in Case No. 189156 has been received. I
 note that you wish to have title extended further than the 194 years
 covered by the present application. I was unaware that any educated
 person in this country, particularly those working in the property  
area, would not know that Louisiana was purchased, by the U.S. , from
  France in 1803, the year of origin identified in our application.

 For the edification of uninformed FHA bureaucrats, the title to the land
 prior to U.S. ownership was obtained from France , which had acquired
 it by Right of Conquest from Spain .

 The land came into the possession of Spain by Right of Discovery
 made in the year 1492 by a sea captain named Christopher
, who had been granted the privilege of seeking a new route
 to India by the Spanish monarch, Isabella.
The good queen, Isabella, being a pious woman and almost as careful about titles as the FHA, took the precaution of securing the blessing of the Pope before she
 sold her jewels to finance Columbus ' expedition.

 Now the Pope, as I'm sure you may know, is the emissary of Jesus
, the Son of God, and God, it is commonly accepted, created
 this world.
Therefore, I believe it is safe to presume that God also
 made that part of the world called Louisiana. God, therefore, would
 be the owner of origin
and His origins date back to before the
 beginning of time, the world as we know it AND the FHA. I hope you
 find God's original claim to be satisfactory. Now, may we have our
 damn loan?"

 He got the loan.....

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